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Stand-Up Comedy Crutches: Top Hack Phrases to Avoid

…there are phrases that are used so much they have become a caricature of themselves. As comedians, they are like nails being pulled across a blackboard when we hear them uttered in a conversation. We know the person saying them is doing so because they have nothing funny or original to say. Yet as comics, we get onstage and say the same tired phrases over and over in front of crowds who have heard them over and over.

Comedy Hack Alert! Photo: STMWhether it’s Chappelle’s Show “I’m Rick James Bitch,” Schwarzenegger’s “I’ll be back” or Borat’s “High five,” there are phrases that are used so much that they become a caricature of themselves. As comedians, they are like nails being pulled across a blackboard when we hear them uttered in a conversation. We know the person saying them is doing so because they have nothing funny or original to say.

Yet as comics, we get onstage and say the same tired phrases over and over in front of crowds who have heard them over and over. Some are old school lines that everyone tends to fall back on, and others are used to “save” a joke. All of them exemplify the term “hack” and show your fellow comedians just how much material you have or don’t have. Let’s talk about a few…

1. “This guy knows what I mean!” or it’s “Brother, you know what I’m talking about.”

The person probably doesn’t know what you mean because the joke before it was about child porn and you need a scapegoat in the audience. I stay home on Fridays and masturbate to goat porn (pause) this guy knows what I’m talking about.”

The joke itself is weak so you make a person in the audience the butt of the joke. Why does it get a laugh? It appeals the second grader in all of us who knows it’s great to see someone else being made fun of because it’s not you.

HACK RATING: 3 out of 5

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